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How to Overcome Low Self-Esteem and Start Gaining Self-Confidence
from:J Sharkey
With so low self-confidence, you might be thinking that you are worthless or a bit less significant than the fellow next to you.
There might be some shades of truth to it but they don't necessarily have to affect you or to destroy you in some ways. If you ponder deeply on the negative effects your low self-confidence may give you then you'll only get to see and understand the negatives. It is the same with seeing the brighter sides of things. What you focus your eyes on would be the focus of your attention.
We can't of course quantify people into simpler categories. We are built complex so lets just say, for the sake of this article, that a human can either have confidence or lack it.
We know how self-confident people bear themselves. They walk, talk and do things well. They are so eloquent and so smart that we look at them with awe. They to us, seem to be all too perfect that we often wonder, "must this be the manner by which men must live. If so, then why can't I be like them?"
As much as we have learned to associate self confident people with these characteristics, we have also acquainted ourselves with the idea that individuals with low self esteem are timid, do not perform well especially when in public.
You see, it all stems from the manner of our disposition. If we bear ourselves well, people think of us as confident. Otherwise, we lack enough confidence.
Well, anyone can gain self-confidence if there is a need. Fortunately, self-confidence is not a trait that we automatically get at birth. It is a learned and conditioned behavior that all of us have a chance to gain.
If you are suffering from low self esteem and you would want to gain some, the first vital thing that you can do is to modify some of your attitudes and perceptions that are closely related to your diminished sense of self-esteem.
Most people chant their mantra when loosing touch with their self-confidence. This is the same as your verbal appeal to your inner self to recondition your mind. Central to this is to repetitively say phrases or words that would affirm your self-confidence. This also covers the idea of not confusing your actions with yourself. The mistakes and errors you have committed are not the true reflections of how bad or good you are. They are but momentary faults made by a good person who was somehow confused at the moment the error was made.
This might sound obvious but will still work- believe in yourself. There is no way that you'll get confident in yourself if you won't believe in what you are capable of doing. The mere thought that you are a single wheel in the coach of the world is enough for you to be equipped mentally and confident of yourself.
And the last thing you would want to do is to commit yourself to negative thoughts. Going negative would obviously not deliver you to the positive road. You have to suppress negative feelings in you and try not to listen to what your old negative self would say. That way, you will be able to gain more of your confidence.
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